Here’s something I hear more often than almost anything else during maternity consultations.
“I want to do this, but I just don’t feel like myself right now.”
Sometimes it comes out quietly, almost apologetically. Sometimes it comes out in a rush of words — a list of every reason a person has talked themselves out of booking for weeks.
I don’t look the way I normally look. My body doesn’t feel like mine. I’m puffy and tired and I’ve been living in the same two pairs of leggings for three months.
I hear this. I understand it. And after 25 years of photographing expecting mothers in my Saint Paul studio, I want to offer you something more useful than empty reassurance.
I want to tell you exactly how to prepare for a maternity session when you don’t feel like yourself — because that feeling doesn’t have to stop you from having images you’ll treasure for the rest of your life.
First: Your Feelings Are Valid and Very Common
Pregnancy changes your body in ways that are profound, rapid, and often disorienting. The person in the mirror may look unfamiliar. Clothes that used to feel like you don’t fit. Your face, your skin, your energy levels — all different.
This is not vanity. This is a completely human response to an enormous physical transformation.
And I want to name something clearly: the clients who tell me they feel least like themselves before their sessions are often the ones who are most moved by their photos afterward.
Because the camera doesn’t see what you see in the mirror. It sees the whole picture — the roundness, the light on your face, the way you hold yourself, the particular expression you have when you look down at your belly or lean into your partner.
It sees you in the middle of something remarkable. And that is worth photographing.
What to Do in the Weeks Before Your Session
Don’t Try to Transform — Focus on Comfort
The most important thing I can tell you about preparing for a maternity session is this: your job is not to arrive looking like a different version of yourself. Your job is to arrive feeling as comfortable as possible.
Comfort translates on camera. Tension does too.
In the weeks before your session, focus on rest where you can get it. Stay hydrated. Do the things that make you feel good — whatever those are for you in pregnancy. A walk, a bath, time with people who make you feel calm.
None of this is about aesthetics. It’s about arriving at your session with a little more ease in your body than you might otherwise have.
Think About What Makes You Feel Like You
I ask every maternity client a version of this question during our consultation: when do you feel most like yourself?
For some people the answer is dressed up — a beautiful gown, polished hair, lipstick. For others it’s casual and natural — minimal makeup, simple clothing, barefoot if possible.
Neither answer is wrong. Both make for beautiful photos.
What I’m trying to understand is your baseline. What’s the version of you that feels most authentic — not aspirational, not performative, but genuinely you? Because that’s the version I want to photograph.
Make a note of it. Bring it to your session.
Gather Your Outfits Early — Don’t Leave It to the Night Before
Outfit stress before a session is real and it affects how you show up. I’ve seen it countless times — a client arrives flustered because they tried on six things at 10pm and nothing felt right and they’re already starting the session feeling defeated.
Here’s how to avoid that.
I send every client a detailed style guide after booking. Read it. Actually read it. It covers colors, fabrics, silhouettes, and what photographs well versus what doesn’t — and it takes the guesswork out of a decision that can otherwise feel overwhelming.
Aim to have your outfits sorted at least a week before your session. Try everything on. Move in it. Sit down in it. Make sure it’s comfortable enough to wear for 1 to 2 hours. If something doesn’t feel right when you try it at home, it won’t feel right on camera.
For most maternity sessions I suggest two to three outfit options — one that feels a bit elevated or special, and one that feels more natural and effortless. We’ll work through them both and you’ll have variety in your gallery.
What to Wear: A Practical Guide for Maternity Sessions
Colors That Photograph Beautifully
Neutrals are almost always a safe choice — creams, whites, taupes, dusty roses, sage greens, soft blues. These tones work with natural and studio light, complement a range of skin tones, and keep the focus where it belongs: on you and your bump.
Rich jewel tones can be beautiful too — deep burgundy, forest green, navy. If these feel more like you than soft neutrals, bring them.
What I’d steer away from: very bright or neon colors that compete with the image, busy patterns or large graphic prints, anything with prominent logos or text.
Silhouettes That Work for the Bump
Fitted or form-following silhouettes tend to show the bump beautifully — whether that’s a fitted dress, a wrap style, or a flowing gown that drapes over the belly. The bump is the centerpiece. Clothing that hides or obscures it often works against the purpose of the session.
I have a small selection of maternity gowns available to borrow at the studio — beautiful, flowing pieces in neutral tones that photograph consistently well. Many clients combine one of their own outfits with one of mine, and it gives the gallery a lovely range.
Shoes are entirely optional. Many clients prefer to be barefoot, and I think there’s something beautifully grounded about that for maternity sessions.
Hair and Makeup
Do whatever makes you feel like your best self — which might mean full hair and makeup, or it might mean clean skin and your hair the way you normally wear it.
If you typically wear makeup and it makes you feel more confident, wear it. If you don’t typically wear much makeup and wearing a lot of it makes you feel like someone else, don’t.
The goal isn’t a specific look. The goal is for you to feel good in your own face when you arrive. That’s what shows up in the photos.
If you’re considering professional hair and makeup, it can be worth it — especially if the getting-ready process is something you find enjoyable rather than stressful. But it is absolutely not required for a beautiful session.
On the Day of Your Session
Eat and Drink Before You Arrive
This sounds basic but it matters more than you might expect. Blood sugar dips make everything harder — your energy, your mood, your ability to relax. Have a proper meal or a substantial snack before your session. Bring water. If you’re someone who tends to feel lightheaded when standing for extended periods, let me know and we’ll build in more seated and resting options.
Give Yourself Extra Time
Don’t rush to your session. Arriving stressed translates into the images, and arriving a few minutes early gives you time to take a breath and settle in.
If you have a partner or children joining you, factor in the extra logistics of getting everyone out the door. A calm, unhurried arrival makes the whole session feel easier.
Tell Me How You’re Feeling
When you arrive, if you’re anxious or uncomfortable or having a hard body image day, tell me. Seriously.
I’m not going to fix it with a pep talk — but knowing where you’re starting from helps me create the right environment for you. I’ll adjust the pacing, the prompts, the approach. My entire job during your session is to help you feel good enough to let the camera in.
You don’t have to perform ease or confidence you don’t feel. Just show up honestly, and I’ll meet you there.
What I Do During Your Session to Help You Feel Comfortable
Part of what 25 years of experience gives me is the ability to read people quickly.
I can see when someone is tense in their shoulders. I can see when a pose feels awkward rather than natural. I can see when someone is in their head too much and needs a different kind of direction.
I don’t just point a camera and tell people to smile. I talk to you throughout the session. I explain what I’m seeing through the lens. I adjust constantly based on what’s working and what isn’t.
I redirect poses that feel uncomfortable. I find angles that work for your body specifically, not for some generic idea of what a maternity session should look like.
And I show you images as we go — not every single one, but enough that you start to see what I see. That shift — when a client stops dreading the camera and starts actually believing the photos might be beautiful — is one of my favorite things to witness.
It happens in almost every session. Even the ones that start with “I really don’t feel like myself right now.”
A Final Word About Feeling Ready
There is no version of pregnancy where every person feels radiant and confident and completely at peace with their body every day.
That is not the standard. That has never been the standard.
The standard is showing up. Deciding that this season of your life — this particular, unrepeatable time — deserves to be documented even if you don’t feel perfectly ready.
I’ve photographed clients who cried in the parking lot before their session because they almost didn’t come. And then they saw their photos and they couldn’t imagine not having them.
I’ve photographed clients who told me they felt beautiful exactly zero percent of the time during their pregnancy — and whose maternity galleries are among the most stunning I’ve ever created.
You don’t have to feel like yourself to have beautiful maternity photos.
You just have to come.
If you’re expecting and you’re on the fence about maternity photos because you don’t feel like yourself right now — that’s exactly the conversation I’d love to have with you. Reach out and let’s talk through what your session could look like.
Check out my Maternity Session Info & Pricing here if you are interested.
